| Rhen | Stupid ass ♥♥♥♥♥ bro | 2023-08-19 00:58:28 |
| Ninchilla | Coming from the one that blew all our pallets on a pig and still got down. That's funny, goofy ass roach XD | 2023-06-27 12:47:22 |
| Hops | Busy sleeping on the hook while i carry you | 2023-06-27 01:00:28 |
| Hops | This man always saves the team | 2023-04-08 14:35:50 |
| Hops | E | 2023-04-03 23:44:39 |
| roker12 | I own a musket for home defense, since that's what the founding fathers intended. Four ruffians break into my house. "What the devil?" As I grab my powdered wig and Kentucky rifle. Blow a golf ball sized hole through the first man, he's dead on the spot. Draw my pistol on the second man, miss him entirely because it's smoothbore and nails the neighbors dog. I have to resort to the cannonmounted at the top of the stairs loaded with grape shot, "Tally ho lads" the grape shot shreds two men in the blast, the sound and extra shrapnel set off car alarms. Fix bayonet and charge the last terrified rapscallion. He Bleeds out waiting on the police to arrive since triangular bayonet wounds are impossible to stitch up. Just as the founding fathers intended. | 2022-11-13 03:56:05 |
| Crusader | E. | 2021-05-25 05:52:14 |
| roker12 | If you ask Rick Astley for a DVD of the movie Up, he won’t give it to you because he’s never gonna give you Up. However, by not giving you Up like you asked for it, he’s letting you down. This is known as the Astley paradox. | 2021-03-18 20:03:13 |
| Rhen | This man suffers from the tragedy of a rare disease equus-gallus which enlarges the penis (many cases the penis grows between 14-16 inches). On account of this disability he is unable to find work as his large erections offend customers and coworkers alike. Please donate to his GoFundMe (in bio) so he can afford a penis reduction surgery and finally work as a walmart customer service rep like he always dreamed | 2020-07-08 02:33:13 |
| Nobelium Uranium | Noice OwO | 2020-06-27 02:00:59 |
| false fox bloomer | My werewolf boyfriend wears me like a sleeve UwU | 2020-06-27 01:45:25 |
| davy.rawr | Me before seeing your profile: uwuMe after seeing your profile: OwO | 2020-05-08 09:53:59 |
| false fox bloomer | Rawr x3 nuzzles how are you pounces on you you're so warm o3o notices you have a bulge o: someone's happy ;) nuzzles your necky wecky~ murr~ | 2020-04-02 23:33:38 |
| Nobelium Uranium | What the ♥♥♥♥ is wrong with you?! | 2020-02-27 23:39:33 |
| false fox bloomer | Just me and my 💕sergal💕, hanging out he got pretty hungry🍆 so he started to pout 😞 He asked if I was down ⬇to be something yummy 😍🍆 and I asked what and he said he'd give me his 💦tummy!💦 Yeah! Yeah!💕💦 He drinks them!💦 He slurps them!💦 He swallows them whole💦 😍 It makes 💘sergal💘 😊happy😊 so it's my only goal... 💕💦😫Deeper briggs! Deeper briggs! 😫💦💕 💦1 vore💦, 💦💦2 vore💦💦, 💦💦💦3 vore💦💦💦, 💦💦💦💦4💦💦💦💦 I'm 💘sergals💘 👑prey 👑but I'm also a ♥♥♥♥♥! 💟 His tummy feels squishy💗!He makes me feel good💜! 💘💘💘He makes me feel everything a little should!~ 💘💘💘 👑💦 | 2020-02-27 18:43:08 |
| SerenityScratch | Ur a fraud | 2020-02-05 13:32:05 |
| false fox bloomer | ∠( ᐛ 」∠)_ | 2020-01-31 06:46:25 |
| davy.rawr | ughheheueneufhugngugngugngujngujgungu | 2020-01-29 14:34:12 |
| SerenityScratch | N O | 2020-01-29 14:02:46 |
| SerenityScratch | ewwwww | 2019-12-03 19:59:59 |
| false fox bloomer | ｊｕｓｔ ｋｉｓｓ ｙｏｕｒ ｍｏｎｅｙ ｂｙｅｂｙｅ | 2019-10-08 05:05:59 |
| davy.rawr | ｅｗ ａｓｓ | 2019-10-02 16:57:54 |
| Nobelium Uranium | ｎｏ ｒｏｎ | 2019-10-02 03:22:44 |
| false fox bloomer | ｇｅｔ ｉｔ ｔｏｇｅｔｈｅｒ ｃｈｒｙｓａｌｉｓ | 2019-09-25 03:39:05 |
| davy.rawr | My poops make the smoke alarm/CO2 detector go offSo last night confirmed what I have always been suspicious about. My poops set off the CO2 detector/smoke alarm. For the past year, every time I've taken a horrendously foul dump, the alarm right outside my restroom goes off. I wasn't sure. I thought maybe it was acting up or the battery was low. It's a periodic beep. Last night when it occurred again, I brought a piece of cardboard and fanned the air outside the restroom and miraculously the alarm stopped beeping.Now I'm concerned. Is there something wrong with me? Colon cancer? Does this happen to anyone else? Does my gut produce such large amounts of methane that it sounds the alarms? Are my ♥♥♥♥♥ that toxic? Could I kill someone with my fumes or at the very least knock them out? Can I weaponize my ass?TLDR; My ass sounds the alarms | 2019-07-13 21:27:32 |
| false fox bloomer | the nut has been cracked™ | 2019-04-07 03:23:56 |
| Carlosthelizard | gormie ily | 2018-04-29 12:09:05 |
| SerenityScratch | Battery acid test:[x] passed [] not passed | 2018-04-25 21:04:11 |
| false fox bloomer | residing on bumpy landscape, fornicating six vehicles, beautiful haiku this is. | 2018-04-02 04:14:20 |
| Carlosthelizard | ur dumb | 2017-06-20 01:49:33 |
| SerenityScratch | don't mess with the shoot shoot or you'll get the n00t noot | 2017-06-05 13:59:35 |
| false fox bloomer | Hey! Hey you! Yes, you. Did you know that %89.420 of you bottled water is filtered ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥? | 2017-06-04 23:49:35 |
| SerenityScratch | *･゜ﾟ･*:.｡..｡.:*･'(*ﾟ▽ﾟ*)'･*:.｡. .｡.:*･゜ﾟ･* | 2016-08-07 21:53:46 |
| SerenityScratch | I LOVE UR PRO PIC OMG JORM | 2016-06-13 18:33:58 |
| SerenityScratch | OH NO! I amSoooo terrified. Oh dear lord, what am I supossed to DO? (This is not sarcastic.) | 2016-05-23 17:22:00 |
| false fox bloomer | The FitnessGram™ Pacer Test is a multistage aerobic capacity test that progressively gets more difficult as it continues. The 20 meter pacer test will begin in 30 seconds. Line up at the start. The running speed starts slowly, but gets faster each minute after you hear this signal. [beep] A single lap should be completed each time you hear this sound. [ding] Remember to run in a straight line, and run as long as possible. The second time you fail to complete a lap before the sound, your test is over. The test will begin on the word start. On your mark, get ready, start. | 2016-04-08 23:54:34 |
| Duck | I sexually Identify as a memer. Ever since I was a boy I dreamed of forging dank maymays. People say to me that a person being a real memer is Impossible and I'm ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ retarded but I don't care. I'm having 9gag inject me with pepe, vines, and JOHN CENA. From now on I want you guys to call me "Dank" and respect my right to bear memes. If you can't accept me you're a dankophobe and need to check your memeration privilege. Thank you for being so understanding. | 2016-01-23 20:09:39 |
